Editor’s note: This is part 2 of a series. Read part 1 here.
My mom went to a local Catholic parish one day, where the priest was offering the Sacrament of Reconciliation. In the back of the church, a woman was engaged in a conversation with a gentleman from the parish. Walking past the couple, my mother heard the woman say she no longer went to confession because she couldn’t think of any sins to confess. This may seem a shockingly shameless admission, but I know many Catholics who, though they may not say it aloud, also have trouble knowing what sins to confess.
Why do we Catholics who would describe ourselves as “religious” have difficulty at times in identifying our sins?
Reasons We May Have Trouble Knowing What to Confess:
- We are no longer struggling with mortal sin. Especially as a more mature Catholic who has been listening and cooperating with God’s grace for some time, we may not be committing mortal sin. When this is the case, we are invited to wage battle with our venial sins and root them out. It is easy to become comfortable and lax and assume that, since we have made some progress in the spiritual life, we can drift along as a good, practicing Catholic. After all, “Compared to So-and-So, I’m a pretty good person.” This perspective is anti-Biblical. “How narrow the gate and constricted the road that leads to life. And those who find it are few” (Matt 7:14) We should heed the example of the Saints. St. Augustine said, “If venial sins be multiplied, they destroy the beauty of our souls so as to deprive us of the embraces of our heavenly spouse. Here is an examination of conscience you can use before going to the Sacrament of Reconciliation to help you identify your venial sins.
- We don’t accept the fact that we are in a state of serious or mortal sin (or on the edge of it), and we are blind to what is occurring in our souls. Perhaps with a misguided notion of the mercy of God, we act as the judge of what iright and wrong—i.e., as long as we feel justified about a certain behavior, it can’t be wrong. Our human nature and the subtle lies of the devil keep us blind and make us stubborn. We are refusing to listen to the voice of the Church, which was given to us by Christ for our good and our happiness.
- We don’t examine our conscience regularly enough to be sensitive to sin. My husband keeps our vehicles in excellent repair, so although I know nothing about cars, I am very sensitive to the sound, feel, and smell of our vehicle. The moment something is off, be it a slightly flat tire or a rough-running engine, I usually notice it. The same is true with a daily review of my thoughts, words, and deeds—the better maintenance I have done through things like attending daily Mass, monthly confession, and frequent examination of conscience, the more sensitive I am to the ways that I have failed to love authentically. Read an article about a simple, daily way to examine your conscience here.
- We don’t understand the role of confessing “imperfections.” In the Gospels, Jesus has a way of challenging religious folks and exposing their true, prideful colors. As a “religious person” myself, his words sometimes make me squirm in my pew. Not only do we need to understand the value of confessing venial sin, but we also should understand how to tackle what the Church calls “imperfections.” Fr. John Bartunek contributed a great article on spiritualdirection.com on the subject of “imperfections.”
The Sacrament of Reconciliation is an unbelievable gift, but, like anything that brings us health and happiness, it forces us to slow down, to inform ourselves, and to act in our own best interest. God is always calling us to growth, deeper healing, and obedience. When we try to meet merely the minimum standard in our relationship with God and others, we play a dangerous game.
